Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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