physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Randomize
