about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
