I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
