can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
They took my balls.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
