I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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