If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Just puked most of my soul out..
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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