5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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