I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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