My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
