Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
