omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
