I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
