I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
