Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize