True but thats because hes a fetus.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
i think i just lost a toe
Randomize
