Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
soo... how was my night?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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