I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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