you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
