Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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