some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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