I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
