I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
