Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Is it penis luge time yet?
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
