Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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