its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Randomize
