what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Randomize
