16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
two words: eviction party
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
