So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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