That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
