____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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