I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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