either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
