Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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