I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize