i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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