Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Randomize
