was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
