My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
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