my mouth tastes like poor choices
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize