angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Randomize