I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize