so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
