is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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