he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize