but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
