Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize