Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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