Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
