But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
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