Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
